The reason that white privilege needs to be called out is because there are two sides to dominance: the oppressed AND the privileged whose privilege creates the oppression. White supremacy is negotiated as a binary by POC’s because we’re forced to live with it as a binary: it doesn’t just disadvantage POC’s, it rewards white people. Pretending privilege doesn’t matter is part of the profound denial that many white people engage in which ACTIVELY allows for white supremacist systems to persist. Is it really the task of POC’s to ensure that white people don’t feel guilty, or is it the task of white people to ask themselves why they feel guilty to begin with? Guilt is a sign that immoral behaviors are taking place, just as burn is the sign that one’s skin is receiving too much heat. Guilt is healthy: it tells us we aren’t behaving appropriately. Now, we ask ourselves why, and behave appropriately. That means admitting privilege exist objectively, even if subjectively one feels one’s own suffering instead of one’s own privilege. This is normal subjective human behavior; however, it doesn’t change reality. Reality is still c. 500 years of white supremacy and ongoing privilege.
Another way to look at this is that white people gain their advantages at the expense of POC’s. This is a negotation of power — the careful and deliberate construction of superiority of European peoples above all others, called ‘subhuman’ — and that power shifts resources from POC”s worldwide, as it has for about 500 years, and gives them to white people. European men devoted their ENTIRE careers to establishing this lie, in all arena of disciplines: Kant (philosophy); Kipling (writing); Berkeley (politics); Edwards (religion) etc etc: this list is hardly comprehensive. As a result of all that hard work and the justification for colonization that allowed this one continent’s leaders to murder so many millions of others on ALL the other continents, white privilege is AUTOMATED for white people now.
It still operates as a binary, whether white people want to see that or not. There is no icing for this s*** cake; there is merely the requirement that people — in particular white ones — smell it for what it is, and then act appropriately. In order to act appropriately, they must find the moral courage to admit their privilege. White privilege is the main reason POC’s are oppressed; without discussing it, we are not having an authentic discussion about whiteness in this society.
I urge you to look at Stephen Yearwood’s writing. He is also a white man, as far as I can tell from his writing and his picture; perhaps you will trust him. He seems to get it.